At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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