Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
