Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
