Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
