whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
