Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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