yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
