Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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