I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
