That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize