Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
