Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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