I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Drunk is not a location!
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
