all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
