He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
