we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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