We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
