she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize