seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize