He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I just gargled with NyQuil
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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