They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
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