Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
