I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
