Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
