so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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