i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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