Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
