I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Randomize
