I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
i drank out of a bidet.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Randomize
