you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
This house was built for laser tag.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize