It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
