mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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