I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
