winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
