he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
