I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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