How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
