I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
