I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
