oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
