Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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