...so i touched it.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
