dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
