K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize