just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
She even gives head with a lisp.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
