tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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