If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
