Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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