Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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