I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
