Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
