he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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