broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
